Wednesday, April 2, 2014

When You're Kid-Free and Single...

When you’re kid-free and single 



…you can visit all the places your friends’ kids 
are named after.

…you can sleep before 3am, but only if you feel like it.

…you can sleep naked.

…you can use your spare room to house your extensive _____ collection.

…you can eat all the candy yourself.

…you can buy coffee ice cream.

…your house can be a mess because of that party 
last night.

…that’s what you can tell your friends.

…you can own a gun cabinet.

…you don’t have to lock it.

…you can password-protect your computer. (just kidding)

…you can post your own picture on your facebook profile

    and it will be doing something awesome.

…you can expend vast amounts of energy on something completely pointless

                                           like videogames.

…you can live on pinterest/tumblr/email/facebook/blog/twitter/instagram

…you can read books without pictures… unless you like pictures.

…you can watch an entire movie. Or three.

…how about those grown-up tv shows?

…you can work long hours, guilt-free. can work part-time, because dinner for one is cheap.

…you can be a bum.

…you can have a pristine lawn

or not.

…every good-looking single man/woman is a potential date.

    even the not-so-good-looking ones.

…you can pretend you’re married.

…you can dance if you want to.

…you can leave your friends behind

    cause your friends don’t dance and if they don’t dance,

    they’re no friends of mine.

…you can leave the toilet seat however you want.

…you can own a million pets,

    if the health department agrees.

…you can invest.

…you can go to Vegas.

…you can devote your life to God.

…you can devote your life to Science.

…you can devote your life to Medicine.

…you can devote your life to the arts.

…you can be happy,

    But only if you want to.


  1. You can also devote your life to achieving all of your personal goals. If that includes building wealth, then you can sprinkle it on the kids of the people who were fortunate enough to call you friend. And in that vein you'll have a lot more kids than you ever imagined!

  2. Have you been spying on me? Haha, you're right. There are so many ways to do that too. I teach an art class for a group of homeschooled teens and preteens and those kids have become so special to me. ^_^

  3. That's so awesome! Being able to serve as a mentor and have an impact on future-generations is one of the major areas where kid-free folks tend to find a void. Way to fill it in! I'm sure your students appreciate you.

  4. Thanks! Whenever I wonder about that, one of them brings me something to confirm it again. It's a great position to have. ^_^


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